First things first…I had the most wonderful Easter. The best part is, not only did I feel good, I remember every detail about it. I hid eggs and baskets, I made Eggs Benedict, I got the girls in cute Easter outfits and off to church, Jan made a wonderful Easter dinner, and I was able to eat it. Lena opened her birthday presents and I remembered to take pictures. I even bumped eggs with Lena. I feel very lucky that I was able to enjoy my Easter.
On Wednesday I leave to go to Seattle for tests, tests and more tests.
Here is my schedule:
Wednesday:
11:30 PM- arrive into Seattle
Thursday:
7 am- PET Scan. This two hour test will show if the cancer has left my body and show that the chemotherapy is working.
11 am- Pulmonary function test to make sure my lungs are still working. One of the chemo drugs I’m on is very harmful to lungs, so this test will make sure the drug is not damaging them.
12:00- Wig. Yes, I have an appointment to get a wig, though I can't promise I'll wear it.
1:00- MUGA test. This is a MUltiple Gated Acquisition scan which will make sure my heart is not being negatively affected by the chemo.
2:30- Radiation consultation. At this meeting, I will meet with the radiation doctor who will go over my radiation treatment plan with me.
Friday:
8 am- Chemo and appointment with my oncologist.
6:00 pm-Fly back to Juneau.
It’s going to be a whirlwind trip and I’m nervous about some of the tests, most especially the PET Scan. I want to feel confident that everything is going to come back good and that they say, “Congratulations, you are now cancer free!” But, I admit to harboring fear and apprehension. With that said, I do feel better and a lot of my symptoms are gone. My rashes have dissipated, I am not utterly exhausted all the time, I no longer have night sweats, my joints are not aching, and I’m not having unexplained dizzy spells. To me, this says the drugs are working. I just hope the tests say the same thing.
This afternoon Lena and I worked in my garden beds ripping out last year’s dead foliage. I never got around to it last fall because I was too pregnant to bend over and scale our rock walls.
Today Lena strolled around in a pink frilly dress and X-tra Tuff boots helping me pull up the dead leaves and stems. I kept showing her the new sprouts and telling her to be careful not to pull them up as well. She was quite curious about the whole process and why we threw away the dead leaves but left the new ones. I found myself explaining to her that the green sprout leaves were new life and wilted brown leaves were dead.
It was very therapeutic for me ripping out the dead stems and exposing the fresh new buds of spring. It gave me hope of brighter things to come like the tulips and rhubarb that will bud in June, and the lilies and iris’ that blossom in July. Come the end of June, I will be done with chemo and by the end of July; I will be done with radiation and hopefully done with cancer forever. When I think of the things yet to come like 6 more chemo treatments and radiation therapy in Seattle away from my family; June and July seem very far away and nearly unreachable. But when I can already see the sprouts of my tulips, rhubarb, lilies and iris’ forcing their way through the hard dirt and spots of snow, June and July seem a lot closer.
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