Always Getting Better

I have so much to write tonight, so grab your coffee, tea, or whatever…
For starters, it’s a good thing I’m on anti-anxiety meds because right now I’d be flying through the roof. Today Aurelia had her 4 month shots. She was supposed to have 4 shots (although three combined in one, so technically 6.) I am already leery of immunizations for babies so I made the decision to have them broken up and we’d come back for the triple shot at a later date. Aurelia did as “okay” as a 4 month old does after getting three shots, but when we got home, let’s just say her mother did not.

There was a message from the nurse telling me to call her at the clinic. She inadvertently gave Aurelia a shot 9 days past expiration date so she’d have to come in and get it again. She said not to worry, that it probably is affective (causing no ill side effects of it being past due), but they have to be on the safe side and have her come in again so it “counts.” So this could potentially mean double dosing and it royally irks me. It doesn’t help matters that Aurelia ran a fever this evening and writhed in pain as she cried. It brought back scary memories of her illness at three weeks old we fumbled through the What to Expect book and struggled with taking her temperature. Addison held her and walked with her until she fell asleep, and so far, so good. We’ll see what tomorrow brings. Poor Lena was so stressed over it, that she woke up at 1 am telling me to take her temperature too. She was fine, but it’s engrained in all of us at this point to worry.

So here it is 2 in the morning and I can’t sleep. It’s situations like these that to me make me not worry about myself. But, since this blog is supposed to track this chapter in my life, I’ll talk about Seattle this week.

First, there were no Piroshkies. It wasn’t the sugar thing, it was the time thing. I simply ran out of time, which is fine. Maybe I’m not meant to get them until I’m all done, perhaps? And for the record, I’m doing pretty good on the anti-sugar kick. Although, Stephanie did e-mail me back and said I should be having some in my diet and not to cut it all out.

I flew into Seattle on Thursday allotting myself plenty of time to make it in case of flight delays. Addison’s Aunt Jeanne picked me up from the airport and we set off on an adventure to find linens for Lena and Aurelia’s room. No linens to be had, but it wasn’t from lack of shopping. I had a lovely dinner with Jeanne and Dave at an Italian restaurant that Dave’s been dining at since he was in the service. Afterwards, I went to stay with Anne and Jeremy, my home away from home in Seattle.

I spent practically all day Friday at Virginia Mason Hospital. I didn’t like being back there, but thankfully had the comfort of a good childhood friend Mariah who I haven’t seen in ages. We have always been friends through mutual friends, but after Friday, I think we forged a firmer friendship without the legs of others to support us. Mariah met me at a café near the hospital where we dined on Eggs Benedict and she gave me gifts of slippers and a shawl. We ventured over to VM and I introduced her to the fun of chemo. Poor Mariah puked halfway through treatment. She wasn’t sure if it was the ham from the Egg’s Bennie (a recent vegetarian gone carnivore) or if it was watching someone get poked and pumped full of chemicals. Thankfully, she recovered quickly and she made me laugh with her great smile and stories. She made me forget about why I was there in the first place.



My port hooked up. It looks like a little butterfly sitting on my chest. The next one is the nurse manually pushing the "Red Devil" treatment.

The point of the trip south was to see my oncologist, Dr. Malplass, and boy did I ask him questions. They ranged from insomnia to depression and he gave me a lot of insight. He was bummed I didn’t have Aurelia because he said he wanted to play with the baby, a true sign of a caring man.

Insomnia I’m going to have to deal with. I’m taking Tylenol PM as suggested previously by my Hodgkin’s pen-pal Eve in Georgia. Dr. Malpass said that was probably my best bet. Unfortunately, insomnia is a sign of the meds and there’s not much to be done. He did give me some advice though with the depression. He confirmed I was coming down from the meds, but also told me I was most likely going through menopause, another side effect of chemo. Don’t worry, it’s only temporary and I’ll get to go through it all again when it’s my natural time to go through it, yeah me. In the meantime, he’s extended some of my pills to help wean me off of them instead of the hard crash. Day one starts tomorrow, we’ll see how it goes.

As Dr. Malpass was leaving my room, he patted me on my knee and said to his intern, “This is why I’m in this business. This is the highlight of my day, seeing someone I know is going to be fine and is going to make it through this.” If that doesn’t give me a vote of confidence, I don’t know what would. My oncologist is a wonderful man.

After chemo, it was nearly 4:00 and Mariah and I met her boyfriend Caspian, also an old friend of mine, for “lunch.” It's so nice that so many of my Ketchikan friends have flocked to the Seattle area. I told Anne that even under the morbid circumstances, I fell lucky to be able to see my friends so often on my Seattle trips.

After lunch, Caspian and Mariah dropped me off at Anne’s office in downtown and I immediately started feeling sick. I quickly popped some anti-nausea meds so I wouldn’t throw up on the bus ride home. They said each treatment would progressively get worse with sickness and I’m starting to recognize that.

Mariah and I saying our goodbyes.

I had a nice evening with Anne and Jeremy, but once again, it was one of those times where I remember I was there, but I can’t tell you the details. I remember Jeremy helping me measure out my medicine before I went to bed, nice guy!

Made it home (another one of those applause landings on the plane due to high winds) and was greeted by my cheerful family with a sign made my Lena and her grandma Jan. I’m glad I’m home too Lena.

Lena with her welcome home sign.

PS- I am a third of the way done with my treatments!